Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Usia Belasan Terakhir

Gatau mau nulis apa tapi pgn nulis. Intinya sih hari ini alhamdulillah sekali lagi Allah ngasih satu hari lebih lama buat gue hidup di dunia ini. Hari ini ga ada bedanya sih cuma ya kebetulan aja bertepatan sm hari kelahiran gue yg alhamdulillah udah 19 tahun dilewatin.

Ga nyangka bisa mencapai umur 19 thn sgitu cepatnya. Umur terakhir di usia belasan cooooy. Taun depan udah kepala dua. Gile idup tuh makin deket kiamat emg terasa cepet, kata2 org2 sih bgitu sotoy aje emg mereka. Ah ngeri emg kalo udah mulai ngomongin idup, tambah usia tambah berat tanggung jawab dan makin ga jelas masa depan gue gimana. Ya Allah...............

Intinya bersyukur bgt deh atas 19 taun keblkg. Alhamdulillah makasih ya Allah puji syukur atas seluruh nikmat-Mu. Smg semua doa orang2 ke gue tercapai. Amiiiiiiin
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Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Heartbreak Warfare

I never been into boyf-girlf relationship but I’ve heard enough of them. Though, I ever been into heartbreak, not that hurts because it’s just a crush, not true definition of loving someone blah blah blah. BUT, I’ve been in this super-unstoppable-painfully-crying-my-eyes-out-whole-night-heartbreak. I need hugs, ice cream, someone to talk to, to help me went through this heartbreak. Yes, when you know that you can’t reach your dreams after all this time, this restless fight is pointless, that’s a real heartbreak. YOU HAVE TO FEEL IT, IT HURTS SO BAD! Thanks God, I’m better now. Just put a fake smile, pretend that I’m moved on and everything’s gonna be all right.

Self and Fish

No one knows you better than yourself. Don’t cry or whine out of your problem to anyone else, either they don’t care or just curious. Trust me. Even it’s your best friend, closest friends or your family. Life is tough, hard and surprising. No one knows what will come up to your life in the next years, months, weeks, days, hours, minutes or even seconds. Everyone has their own problem don’t bother them with your problem too. It’s too selfish I think. I rarely tell my problem to anyone, back then in highschool life I probably never tell my problem to my friends, I’d rather write, you can go check my laptop and I have a lot of unfinished writings about anything, any possible thing that could across my mind. Why I rather keep it to myself? Because as I told you earlier, it’s too selfish to bother someone else with your problem. People change. I do change. Now, I love to talk to anyone about anything, but still not blabbering all out, you know. It’s not what I don’t feel, it’s what I don’t show to you guys. I don’t have any idea what I wrote, it’s pointless I guess. So I gotta go, bye.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Mari Cukupkan Saja Perjalanan Ini

Delapan belas taun gue hidup, delapan belas taun seinget gue ga pernah ganti cita-cita. Dokter, selalu dokter. Gatau ya, mungkin pernah kesebut hal lain selain dokter, tapi seinget gue ga pernah. Ya perjuangan untuk jadi dokter pastinya harus diawali masuk Fakultas Kedokteran kan... nah awalnya pun gue ga bisa yaaa udah deh. Bisa sih masuk FK universitas swasta tapi gue gamau, gue gabisa ngubah pemikiran itu. Bokap nyokap gapapa malah gue masuk FK swasta tapi gamau aja. Gengsi kali ya faktor utamanya dan banyak faktor lain tentunya

Nah udah deh, kemaren kan ikut SNMPTN tuh, tes yang ke 10 gue dan jeng jeng... ga diterima juga. Coba flashback, pertama ikut PBS UGM, UM Undip 1, UTUL UGM, SIMAK UI, UM Unsoed. FKUGM Int'l, UMB, SNMPTN 2010, SNMPTN 2011, baru 9 apa ya, lupa satu lagi... OHIYA SMUP Unpad! Iyalah gue lupa orang itu itungannya gue diterima hahahaha. Nah agak maruk sih ya banyak bgt itu tesnya. Gue ga nyerah untuk tes tapi ga dibarengi dengan keseriusan belajar yang smakin meningkat ya jadi gini. Emg bener kata orang, ga ada salahnya mencoba, tapi lo kalo nyoba terus tapi ga ada usahanya sama aja nol besar ga sih.

Selama setengah taun ke belakang ngejalanin tes2 itu gue, seinget gue ngerasa sedih dan down banget cuma 2x yaitu pas pengumuman Undip dan ini terakhir, pengumuman SNMPTN. gila banget itu downnya pas Undip gue inget banget nangis sendiri di kamar. itu kalo ga salah pengumuman hari Jumat abis BTA, inget banget gue karena waktu itu si Danes diterima FK dan sabtunya diselametin di kelas BTA gitu dia. Nah ini nih pamungkas banget nangisnya pas pengumuman SNMPTN kemarin. Semaleman ga tidur, nangisnya on-off, untung ada temen2 gue yang selalu mendampingi, kalo ga gue nangisnya bisa nonstop mata gue ilang hahahaha.

Si Isal nemenin ngobrol macem2 ngalor ngidul, Monic juga tapi dia lebih ngedengerin doang. Ada Karin, Ayes, Cacha yang bikin ketawaaaaaaa terus. Makasi banyak buat mereka, gatau lagi harus bales apa kalo udah kaya gini2….

Sebenernya gue nangis bukan meratapi nasib gue yang ga diterima ini. Tapi lebih ke perasaan bersalah mengecewakan orang2 yang udah ngedukung, nyemangatin, ngedoain, ngarepin dan segala macemnya. Ya bolehlah mereka bilang gapapa Fi, tapi pasti adalah terbersit perasaan kecewa kan dalam hati mereka, yakin wasaikin gue. Nah yang gitu2 yang bikin gue nangis terus sepanjang minggu ini dari rabu kemarin, nyokap nelfon nangis, yangti nelfon nangis, pakde Pi nelfon nangis lagi hahahaha. Gila gila itu ga enak banget mata gue rasanya udah kisut ga ada air matanya tapi masih aja ngalir, udah kaya air zam2 tau ga lo, ga ada abis2nya haha sumpah ga lebay tapi itu gue nangis terus gila banget..

Dan di titik gue udah bisa berhenti nangis, akhirnya gue sadar ngapain juga nangis mulu ga ada gunanya, gue mau tangisin sampe 23809573406 liter air mata pun ga akan merubah keadaan dan yaudah sih ya bodo amat ngecewain orang. Turning point banget, udah deh Alhamdulillah ga nangis lagi.

Rasanya gue udah sampe tujuan perjalanan gue ini, bukan tujuan terakhir emang, gue ngerasa gue udah berhasil diantarkam ke titik dimana “udah Fi stop lo gak akan sampe ke tempat yang lo pengen, kalo lo terusin ya lo hanya akan muter2 di jalan yang sama, lo harus belok ke jalan lain”. Kalo ga ky gitu gue akan terus nyoba tapi pointless, ga ada hasilnya. Ya mari cukupkan saja perjalanan di jalur D ini, dokter maksudnya hahaha. Harus pindah ke jalur sebelah, jalur E, Ekonomi.

Monday, May 30, 2011

Menulis

Kehilangan kemampuan menulis, sungguh itu yang benar2 terjadi sekarang. Dulu jaman SMP, dengan Kurikulum Berbasis Kompetensi yang baru gencar2nya ada, gue bener2 dituntut untuk bisa nulis. Ya bisa dibilang kemampuan menulis gue ga buruk kok. Pertama kali inget banget pak Ucok, guru Bahasa Indonesia gue pas kelas 7 muji puisi gue, dan dikasih nilai 85. Nilai 85 itu bisa dibilang nilai yg tinggi soalnya biasanya pak Ucok ngsi nilai ke yg lain 70an. Dan gue pernah bikin cerpen pas kelas 8, gurunya pak Armat, gue inget banget dia bilang ini cerita gue bagus. Sombong yee, bodo amaaaat hahaha

See, I had something on my writings.

Since highschool, sucks. No more writings, never have assignment like to make such a real writings, I mean like sastra thingy. Probably my teacher ever got me to make writings but I end up just use Ctrl+C then Ctrl+V, if you know what I mean... and having this blog is like maintaining my writings skills.

Jarang bgt skrg nulis pake bahasa Indonesia, bukannya ga cinta bahasa sendiri ato apa ya tapi sejak gue msk kelas bahasa Inggris di kuliah gue ngerasa harus dituntut untuk bisa berbahasa Inggris yang baik. Gatau gmn nasibnya ntr skripsi kalo bahasa Inggris gue ancur.

Speaking of college life, I ever told you that I enjoy too much being here, in Economic Development Studies Major Universitas Padjadjaran. I won't survive in economics major, which is not I wanted, without big family of ESP, Ekonomi Studi Pembangunan. Anyone ever says that you have to do something you never done to get something you never had. Now I have to make this decision to be brave leave my comfort zone to pursue my dream, you-know-what-it-is.

Doakan ya mau SNMPTN lagi nih taun ini, masih sama pilihannya tapi bedanya taun ini pilihannya UGM dan UNPAD. Mencoba lebih realistis dengan dua pilihan itu. Semoga diterima ya Allah amin 0:)
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Sunday, May 8, 2011

Reminiscing ESPOSE 2011, moment to remember

I'll remember the time when Teh AW recruit me as her staff...
I'll remember the first meeting divission at pelataran rkm...
I'll remember the first time we went to Djarum to give proposal sponsorship...
I'll remember the shock when I was told to call Olivia Ong's management which is in Singapore...
I'll remember the second time we went to Djarum, further discussion of this event...
I'll remember went to Jakarta with Deny Karin Ayesh Vimo Jagap Joni to send proposal sponsorhip to Pertamina and Nestle...
I'll remember rapat akbar sampe malem...
I'll remember selling over 400ish presale ticket with my incredible humas team...
I'll remember dimarahin Teh Risa gara2 ketawa pas rapat...
I'll remember checking and arranged 2500 tickets one by one...
I'll remember being Liasion Officer of Fruit n Salads..
I'll remember helping body and bag-checking at entrance...
I'll remember watching the show from the very front row...
I'll remember singing out loud with the crowd...
I'll remember Barry's glance at me...
I'll remember the moment when take picture and got autograph from Barry on my crew shirt...
I'll remember the feeling when the show's over and everyone feels glad...
I'll remember the expression, the look and the face of everyone who feels proud and satisfied with this event...
I'll remember when I checked Twitter and ESPOSE got lot of compliment, congratulation and salutation...
I'll try to remember every single thing what I've been thru as ESPOSE 2011 crew...

It was great pleasure and an honor being part of you guys. I love you ESPOSE 2011. Thks to all crews, all ESPers for the support, especially ESPektasi, vESPa, e!10 yg blm pny nama angkatan haha. This is something guys!!! Good job. Optimistically, see you next year :)
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Friday, April 22, 2011

ESPOSE 2011 'Jazz Up The Ethnic Philosophy'

HIMA ESP UNPAD proudly presents

ESPOSE 2011
'Jazz Up The Ethnic Philosophy'
Saturday, May 7th, 2011
@ Sasana Budaya Ganesha, Bandung

Glen Fredly
Andien
Barry Likumahuwa Project
Endah N Rhesa
Saung Angklung Udjo
Fruit N Salads
Jemima
Kinetik
Ramez
EDGE

Ticket only 60.000 IDR.

Follow us on Twitter @espose2011!
Further info for ticket purchasing, contact me via afifahsekararum@yahoo.com
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Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Siti nurbaya ooh siti nurbaya..

Deny: "fi, lo pernah pacaran ga?"
Gue: "Engga, gue ga boleh pacaran sm nyokap bokap gue"
Sandy: "kenapa ga iseng aja gitu ngelawan?"
Deny: "Iya blg sm nyokap lo, 'ini bukan jaman malin kundang lagi'"
Afi: "hah malin kundang? Siti nurbaya bodooooooooh"

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Saturday, March 5, 2011

Enjoying Bandung

My dad misses me so much he just called. I've been not coming home for about a month, most of my friends come home this weekend, I decided not to. I don't know know, I just feel have not miss my home yet. Besides, I have this event I have to attend. I'm just being responsible as the comittee.

I'm not that typical daughter who's easily misses my family. My parents, especially my mom, travel a lot for business that makes me getting used to living without my parents. in fact I enjoy too much here in Bandung. My dad once asked me where I want to live, I answered anywhere but Jakarta. I don't really like Jakarta, I probably doubtedly never did. You know, mostly because of the traffic madness and the weather.

I never thought I would live here in Bandung, especially as a student. Well, you know I always wanted to be in Jogja, study in FKUGM, I still wanted them though haha. So accidently, living here, in Bandung, is such a beyond imagination, turned out to be the most enjoyable city I've ever lived, because I live without family I think, besides all of that I love Bandung I could spent the rest of my life here. I was too hiperbolic for the last one hahahaha. I'm not going back home until next month so all I can do is enjoying Bandung.

I'm too much enjoying this city, I finally got this fckin flu I sneeze all the time *sneezing* God bless me. LOL. Bear with my bad english, guys hahaha. Ok see ya, bye
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Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Point Break

There's a point when you are so busy with your activities and you can't take a rest even to take a deep long breath. The only thing that can stop you is getting sick. That's what I've been through. Kinda sucks but in the other hand I'm grateful. I got a chance to take a rest, stay in my room all day, just lying in my bed. Thanks to my friends for taking care of me :)
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Wednesday, January 5, 2011