Friday, December 24, 2010

Dependency

I am being attach too much on you all guys and I sure forget how to be independent. See, this weekend is christmas holiday and my friends are going home so I end up spending this weekend alone. Since I live in Bandung, being away from your family, it's hard to live, I mean doing activities like have 3 times a day meal, doing laundry and stuff, with no company. I'm so dependent to my friends.

Anyway that's okay I kinda do have to learn to be independent again. Happy holiday everyoneeeee. Merry christmas for those who celebrate it, may you all surrounded by joy and grace with your loved ones.
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Wednesday, December 22, 2010

1 minute 56 scnd mom's day greeting call

Pretty much like this

A: halo assalamualaikum? mamaaaa kok ga bisa ditlfn daritadiiii? Lg diluar kota?
M: ah bisa ah. Mama lagi di Bogor sayang. Kenapa?
A: ya mau ngucapin selamat hari ibu
M: iya kan udah dibales bbmnya. Makasi ya sayang
A: engga masuk di aku bbmnya, pending ya ma?
M: wah gatau tuh ya. Kamu udah jadi beli tiket finalnya?
A: udah dong kmrn bru ditransfer.
M: Ini kamu belom mandi deh pasti
A: hehehehehe. Kuliahnya baru setengah 3 ma
M: ya tetep aja harus mandi pagi biar tertib, kalo mandinya ga sekarang ya namanya bukan mandi pagi
A: iya ma nantiiiii
M: jgn lupa belajar loh
A: iya kan minggu ini review praktikum pasti belajaaaar
(Padahal reviewnya udah selese semua)
M: belajar yg rajin jgn pas2an nilainya biar S2nya gampang dapet beasiswa
A: aaaaaa iyaaa maaaaa
M: belajar serius loh. nnti abis tgl 29 kamu balik k bdg lg tgl brp?
A: gatau aku mau taunbaruan di bandung sepertinya
M: loh? Kan ada bude fik ke jakarta kasian ga ada temennya
A: iya tapi aku tgl 3 UAS lg. Yaudah pulang tgl 1 sore aja gmn?
M: yaudah nnti kabar2i lagi aja ya.
A: yaudah deh ya sekali lg selamat hari ibu ya ma. I love you
M: oke makasi sayang love you too.
A: semlekum
M: wa'alaikumsalam

Aaaaa it's good to hear ur voice first thing in the morning mom. Eventho I have to call you gazillion times maybe, finally I can call youuuu. See you 29 Desember ya maaaa. I love you wholeheartedly
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Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Happy Mom's Day to every single living mother on the whole universe

It's been awhile. Life's been good. I get to know lotsa people more and more. I enjoy every single second here in ESP UNPAD. This week is final week of my very first semester as college student. Last meeting of courses, reviews of lab class and else. I've gratefully done all reviews... THKS GOD!!! To be frank, I don't care the results at all.

Since I got all done this week by today, I got this chance to come home again but I miss it. I could have spent mom's day with my very own mom, at least I meet her eventho not full day. I know it's just another day but I realize I never did somethin special to my mom at that day. So I kinda want to give her somethin special, I always have plans to do this and that but it never happens. Hopefully next year...

Mom, you probably never gonna read this but that doesn't matter bcs I know you know I love you too much, three much, four much. Mom, sorry I never be the person you wanted me to be, I'm trying mom, I'm just not getting there, yet. I don't what to write anymore

I just wanna say happy mother's day to every mom in galaxy milkyway I want to make a rhyme but I failed anyway

I probably way too early but in the other side of world is twenty second already right? Selamat hari ibu untuk semua ibu seluruh dunia!
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Sunday, December 12, 2010

Memories

People are busy capturing their favourite moment with camera, I'm busy capturing my favourite moment only with my photographical memory. I don't get the idea of spending moment with a lot of capturing picture, I mean I have experienced it back then in high school while I got this event and I'm busy capturing picture of myself and my friends and I end up didnt get the essence of the event.

The essence, I mean, is the story of it, the memories of it. I realize photos and pictures are good way to keep your memories but the memories that lies in your heart is the other thing, the most important one. Now if I got this moment I won't keep myself busy capturing picture I will be busy capturing the memories that will lies in my mind, in my heart forever.

I'm just saying, no reason why I wrote this. Anyway here I am in villa of GONG 2010. Alhamdulillah it's over. I'm glad, I'm satisfied eventhough there's still a lot of mistakes and misscommunication here and there... Good job e!10. Well done!!! I love you, sure I'm gonna miss these moment we spent in this past couple months. See you in next proker angkatan, PPJ!!!
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Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Homesickness

I had this sickness over and over again. This is probably the third time I got this headache plus stomachache plus every possible ache that body could have in this freakin cold weather of Bandung. My mom said "ini cuma sakit kesepian" hahahaha and she is right. I got this expiration date of missing my home, if I reach over 3 weeks without coming home I'll get sick hahahaha. Weird huh? So GONG 2010 coming up in 3 days and hopefully I'll be fully fit and healthy on the D-day. Okay, bye bye
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Monday, November 22, 2010

mobile-blogging

Since I finally use Blackberry, which is I totally refuse to use it back then, I'll try to do mobile-blogging. It's cool I guess haha. So you'll hopefully get some short updates or story oftenly. Ok, now this is kinda my first mobile-blogging so enjoy :))
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You Know Who You Are

People say "everything happens for a reason". I know now why. I wouldn't be with you all now if I got accepted in meds school. At some point, I'm grateful for this. Being with you all such a bless, such a good thing that never come across my mind. I know we're friends for only couple weeks or months probably but I'm really looking forward to make this friendship last. I know nothing lasts forever, since you all are special I'll make an exception. We will last forever. Don't ask why I write this, bcs I can't answer either. I know it's cheesy, lame, unyu, whatever. Really, I'm grateful for whom I with. Thanks guys.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Capek Hati

pernah gak sih ngerasa tiba2 males ngapa2in, ga ada gairah hidup, capek, bosen? Itu yang sekarang gue rasain, dan gue gatau cara apa biar gue semangat idup lg. capek ya membohongi diri sendiri, capek banget malah. capek hati. ya Allahhhhhhhhh :'(

Friday, November 5, 2010

Home

Yes, home sweet home, finally... after rrrrr 3 weeks? My last visit is not counted, I was sick and it's only for few hours. So, it's 7 weeks probably. Being home is such rrrrr undescribable feeling. Really. And after this home-coming I probably am not gonna come home till December or January.

So, how's my life in Bandung? Pls, don't ask, hey but you just asked, okay stupid monologue. My life's been hectic, tiring, exciting and amazing at the same time. This econ major turns out to be so much fun, bcs it's awhole new thing for me as a science student in high school. The best part is the new friends. I won't survive without them. Really. I love you, e!10

I just finished my very bery first mid-term exam, 9 hours ago to be precise. My mom asked 'how was it?" and I replied only with "Yaaaaa begitulah...". I can only hope for best result. In case for the worst, bad bad very bad score. I'm not gonna regret any of my exam's score, it's only the beginning anyway, still have enough time to fix it, study harder and harder. If failed, then try again. It's not the end of the worrrrrrrrrrrrrld. Just enjoy, find the new rhythm of this college life and be focus. I'm gonna updates as much as possible. Enough for now. Byeeeeeeeeee

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

4:02

It's 3.32 in the earliest human morning on earth. I suddenly woke up. I still am sleeeeeeeeepy but I can't fall asleep again and, of course, that's sucks!

All of sudden, my hands and its fingers lead me to this page, writing this post. My fingers told my brain not to think about what they gonna do. I do not think this post is my brain's work but of course it is!

See, this is what's gonna be if you do somethin without your brain in fully control. My writing's pointless. WTF.

I need blogging more, I guess. SO catch you later! BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Sunday, September 5, 2010

RINDU HATI INI

geli banget ga sih judulnya.......................... -,-
eh tapi beneran gue lagi rindu2nya, lagi kangen2nya, kalo ditanya apa yang gue rasakan sekarang, gue akan teriak KANGEN!!! dengan lantang.
kangen siapa sih, Fi, sampe segitunya? kangen sama temen2 SMAAAAAAAAA!
Gilak bgt gue ga pernah sekangen ini nih, kangennya tuh sampe galau2 gimana gitu rasanya
Lebih kangen daripada sm nyokap gue, gila bayangin segitu tuh kangennya. Iyalah sama temen SMA dulu hampir 24/7 ketemu #lebay, kalo nyokap sibuk terus kerja pergi sana sini ya udah biasalah ditinggal2 ga ketemu nah ini yang biasanya ketemu dari senin-jumat pagi-sore trs skrg udah ga ktmu hampir 2 bulan gimana ga kangennnnnn.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Someday

this is my friend's. she took it on her vacation around europe this summer. she's a lucky bastard. I envy her so bad. I definitely am going to spend my money on this, yes goin to france and visit Eiffel tower. Someday...

Friday, June 11, 2010

Love Equals Football

I love football!

I'm soooooooo excited with this World Cup 2010! Lil' dissapointed with the Opening Ceremony, the stadium wasn't so crowded the seats' not full, I didnt feel the euphoria like I had experienced in 2006 I dont know why. So, here we come here we go I'm gonna trying to watch aaaaall the matches after June 17th, haha not gonna happen that's too much

Self-encouragement

Yiah gaya bgt ya bahasanya. Engga gue cm mau memotivasi diri sendiri aja deh, gatau lagi dengan jalan apa gue bisa menghimpun asa yg telah berserah beeeeeeeeeh gaya. Gue skrg udah sadar kalo kekecewaan dateng saat lo terlalu banyak berharap, berekspektasi tinggi. Gue jadi inget tulisan di Buken FDV, Ekspektasi Nol, ya gue akan berekspektasi nol. Ga bukan ga optimis, ya pkoknya gitulah. Haha ga jelas bgt

Somehow gue merasa apa yg ada di kepala gue kl ga gue tulisin, ato gue omongin ke orang jadi bkin gue nangis, makan ati, menyayat hati, apapun deh namanya, akhirnya gue seminggu ini being sooooooooo overly emotional, sensitive, I cried easily, for God's sake! Dont you believe that I cried all the time during I saw Karate Kid! Yes that one was so encouraging, about the fight and struggle which is sooooo me now.

Gue ngerasa dari awal gue mau msk kedokteran gue udah salah niat, makanya Allah ga ngasih2 juga sampai detik ini. Gue semata2 hanya pgn cita2 gue tercapai, memenuhi ambisi dari kecil, menjawab rasa penasaran gue sm ilmu kedokteran, gue salah. Gue ga seharusnya self-centered. Dan diperparah lagi gue menutup beberapa peluang krn gue berharap gue sekolah di luar jakarta dan yeah that tough one! Dunia ga cuma selebar jakarta yg menurut gue emg ga lebar haha, hidup ga cuma Jakarta, saingan lo dari seluruh jagat raya.

Gue udah deh pasrah aja skrg, kl jodoh ya dapet kl ga dapet yaudah 3 taun ke depan gue msh berkesempatan kan. Gue cuma berharap kl gue di ekonomi unpad bisa lebih membahagiakan hidup nyokap bokap gue and so be it. Tp kl ada yg bisa lebih membahagiakan lagi, ya kedokteran mksdnya, semoga Allah ngasih deh. Ga deh gue cuma pgn gue berguna bagi orgtua, agama, nusa bangsa dan negara!

Lagian ekonomi juga bagus hey, gue harus bisa memperbaiki carut marut perekonomian Indonesia! Dan yah abis SNMPTN gue harus belajar Ekonomi bgt2an ni kynya, gila aja apa gue buta bgt ekonomi, Ekonomi ga pernah ada di otak gue 2 taun ke belakang secara gue anak IPA dan msk UNPAD jg yg dites cm kemampuan dasar ga pake kemampuan ips, ah lebay sih gue ada sih Ekonomi di otak gue, ya bis kelas ekonomi, guru ekonomi, ehm, dan ekonomi yg suka ngetem itu, iya gue tau itu mentro mini mksdnya, anjrit gue udah makin ga jelas

Yaudah deh doakan yg terbaik aja ya semua! Gue ga tau lagi dengan jalan apa gue bisa masuk FK selain doa dari orgtua dan dari lo2 semua! So, guys see you after SNMPTN I think.

Aaaaand I'm welcoming the euphoria of WORLD CUP 2010!!!

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

I don't give up, just a delay!

I miss you red-dish! Sorry I've been leaving you for a rrr... while. Blame toinfinity-andbeyond and his coolness haha. Okay, what did I do? I just gave my blogs a sexual identity! --,

Ok, since my tumblr's dashboard is full of Glee season finale spoilers I can't, actually I don't want to see it. So this is my getaway, the pefect one. red-dish, after all, you are always be my number one in my heart! haha

You know what I've been through right? Yes yes yes I'm still on my fight to enter this fucking meds school! And after all these tests, yes I had 8 tests, I still dont get this future school! Thanks God, I got accepted in UNPAD, but not meds school unfortunately! I overused exclamation mark! --> I just did it again.

So I decided to take this economic studies in UNPAD but no, don't think that, I don't give up on my very first goal, my ultimate goal of my life, become a doctor, I just delay it maybe.

I fortunately still have this last shot to enter meds school this year, SNMPTN! So, fight is still on and I won't leave my battlefield yet! Keep praying for me, will ya?

Today I was sooooo happy. Today is announcement day of PMBP ITB Terpusat. Today I heard a lot of great news. I'm so happy finally my friends richly deserve what they got! So proud of them, really.

On the other side I had this regret I didnt take PMBP Terpusat, but now I feel it was a good decision. I just didn't wanna waste more money to pay for the enrollment, I didn't wanna take a test that I took it halfheartedly. So once again these congratulation and salutation go to you all guys!

God, I just realize how broke my english is! I'd better improve them bcs I just decide to take this economic studies with english as the introductory language.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

I got my Year Book today. I am happy, satisfied and relieved but on the other side I'm sad, teribbly very sad. No, not sad, it's not the appropriate word. Hm... I don't know I feel so overly... overly... ah I couldn't find the word. So this is the book,
It was good, real good *hey it's a brand!* I couldn't find the right word to describe what's inside this book. To me personally, this book has a lot of story. Every picture there has each story behind it. This is like portable time machine, I suddenly flashing back to my past and re-experience all the things I did during high school years! Really. I'm gonna miss high school, miss them so bad it hurts. No, I'm not gonna get anything like these again in my whole entire life. I'm sure not gonna experience anything more awesome than these, because I won't experience it with exact same people, same time, same place!


So, it was an incredible moments with you all guys! I love you wholeheartedly!!! See you soon, buddies :)) <3

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Nothing

Just nothing. I don't know what to write. It's exactly gonna be a bunch of crap, words without meaning, without point. My life no longer fun, at least now, today. I desperately live my life without no destination. Hell, what was that? I wrote that exactly? See, this is me now, first day of period, nothing's going wrong and I said that I desperately live my life without no destination? What a bunch of crap I wrote!!!

Okay I need to do something valuable. Not like this. Stop do these things Fi! Your life is fine. Just fine. It's just another bad day. Just take a long deep breath. Inale. Exhale. Hufffff............

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Jalan

Hidup adalah perjalanan

Melangkahkan kaki menyusuri jalan

Jalan yang penuh rintangan


Tujuan hidup kita sama

Namun mungkin saja

kita mengambil jalan yang berbeda


Bahkan

jika memang ditakdirkan

berada di satu jalan

pasti kita akan bertemu belokan

atau persimpangan


Disana kita memilih

ke kanan atau kiri

Kemana hati

akan membawa kaki ini


Tak ada yang tahu

Dengan apa

atau siapa

akan bertemu


Selamat jalan

dan sampai jumpa kawan

Sampai bertemu di tempat tujuan

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Buat Kamu

-->
“Fi, gimana, Fi?”
“Gimana apanya?”
“Itu yang kemarin gue cerita sama lo.”
“Oh, yaudah gampang, nanti istirahat gue kenalin.”
“Demi apa?”
“Iya, beneran. Mau ga dikenalin?”
“Iya iya iya…”
“Yaudah.”
“Parah, lo emang sahabat gue paling oke sedunia!”
Dika pergi meninggalkanku sambil senyum-senyum sendiri. Dika selalu begitu. Dia selalu gampang tertarik dengan seorang perempuan. Yang kali ini, dia bertemu di angkot saat dia pulang kemarin. Tak disangka tak dinyana ternyata yang dia lihat itu temanku, Intan. Aneh, padahal Intan juga satu sekolah denganku dan Dika, tapi mengapa Dika baru lihat si Intan kemarin. Ckckck.
***
Pagi ini berlalu seperti biasa, tapi tidak biasa dalam tiga bulan terakhir ini. Biasanya tiap pagi begitu sampai sekolah aku sudah disambut hangat oleh Dika, biasanya dia meminjam PRku dan menyonteknya atau bahkan hanya mengobrol biasa, tapi tidak untuk tiga bulan terakhir ini. Semenjak Dika berkenalan dengan Intan, Dika mulai dekat dengan Intan. Aku ikut senang dengan kedekatan mereka. Dika bercerita tentang Intan, begitu juga Intan bercerita tentang Dika. Untuk yang pertama kalinya aku menjadi mak comblang, tidak beberapa lama setelah perkenalan itu mereka berdua jadian. Ya, bisa ditebak itu mengapa Dika sekarang cuek denganku. Kami hanya bertegur sapa seperlunya. Dika masih suka mengobrol denganku, ya, tapi aku merasa kami sudah tidak sedekat dulu. Tidak, aku tidak cemburu. Aku hanya merasa kehilangan seorang teman. Itu saja.
Dika adalah temanku sejak SMP. Aku sangat senang berteman dengannya. Kami memiliki kesukaan yang sama, yaitu Liverpool. Ya, klub sepakbola itu. Pertemanan kami dimulai saat Dika tidak sengaja melihatku membaca buku biografi Steven Gerrard, pemain kesukaanku. Dia membahas tentang Gerrard dan Liverpool, lalu kami berkenalan. Kami mulai dekat semenjak aku tahu rumah Dika searah denganku, semenjak itu tiap sore aku pulang dengan Dika. Bahkan ketika Dika ada latihan futsal aku kadang menunggunya lalu kami pulang bersama. Kadang kami tidak langsung pulang, kami makan dulu di warung tenda dekat pasar rumah kami. Makanan favorit kami adalah mie aceh. Ya itu sedikit cerita tentang persahabatanku dengan Dika.
“Fi, kemarin gue makan sama Intan di warung mie aceh Pak Alisyah loh”
“Wah, selamat ya. Kapan ya terakhir kita makan disana?”
“Hm… udah lama juga ya.”
“Banget. Nanti sore yuk”
“Yah, maaf, Fi, nanti sore ga bisa. Gue mau nemenin Intan ke Aksara”
“Oh…”
“Fi…” Dika merangkulku, aku menghindar. “Lo ga cemburu sama Intan kan?”
“Ngapain juga gue cemburu, gue malah seneng kali ngeliat kalian berdua, Dik.”
“Iya bener juga lo. Gue cuma ngerasa akhir-akhir ini lo ga seceria dulu”
“Ya iyalah ga seceria dulu, gue udah ga ada temen ngomongin Liverpool, ga ada temen pulang bareng, ga ada temen makan di warung mie aceh Pak Alisyah…”
***
“Ntan, apa kabar Dika?”
“Baik-baik aja kayaknya, Fi. Emang kenapa?”
“Gapapa, cuma pengen tau aja”
“Bukannya rumah kalian deketan ya? Harusnya lo lebih tau kabar dia dong. Hehe”
“Iya nih, dia akhir-akhir ini jarang main sama gue”
“Ntar deh gue bilangin ke dia kalo lo kangen…”
“Ih, ngapain juga kangen.”
“Hahaha duluan ya, Fi.”
“Daaaa ati-ati ya…”
***
Jam di kamarku menunjukkan pukul 19.52. Aku duduk di meja belajarku, menatap fotoku dengan teman sekelasku, XI IPA 6. Di foto itu aku berada di sebelah Dika, dia merangkulku dengan hangat. Foto itu diambil tahun lalu, saat sekolah kami mengadakan class meeting. Tiba-tiba handphoneku bergetar. Drrrrrt…. 1 New Message from DikaJ. Aku baca SMS itu. “Fi, makan yuk di warung Pak Alisyah. Bls” Aku segera membalas. “Tumben, yaudah sekalian gue juga belum makan malem nih. Jemput ya.” Aku segera berganti pakaian dan mengambil jaketku. Setelah rapi aku kembali mengecek handphoneku, ada balasan dari Dika. “Ok…”
Aku pamit kepada ibuku. Dika sudah menungguku di depan dengan motor bebek milik abangnya.
“Nih, helmnya..” kata Dika sambil memberikan helm kepadaku.
“Ok, lo kenapa tiba2 ngajak gue makan, Dik?”
“Gapapa pengen aja makan sama lo. Udah lama juga kan? Lo ga kangen apa sama gue? Wakakak
“Ih…”
Motor pun langsung melaju.
Setelah sampai di warung tenda favorit kami, aku langsung memesan mie goreng basah untukku dan mie rebus untuk Dika. Kami duduk berhadapan. Kami hanya terdiam. Aku tidak tahu harus memulai pembicaraan dengan topik apa, sudah lama semenjak Dika jadian dengan Intan.
“Apa kabar lo sama Intan? Baik-baik aja kan?
“Iya baik-baik aja. Rabu kemarin kita 4 bulanan”
“Wah ga terasa banget ya, Dik. Kayanya baru kemarin gue ngenalin dia ke elo.”
“Iya cepet banget waktu berlalu, bentar lagi kita mau lulus juga nih”
“Kalo inget kita udah mau lulus gue langsung sakit perut. Deg-degan banget. Takut ga lulus dan ga keterima di universitas mana gitu”
“Yah jangan pesimislah, belajar makanya… Mau jadi dokter kan? FKUNPAD?”
“Iya Amin ya Allah, semoga keterima. Lo masih mau FITB ITB kan? Oseanografi?”
“Iya, kok lo inget sih?”
“Lo kan pernah menjanjikan gue bakal diving di Raja Ampat.”
“Oya, kok gue bisa lupa sih”
“Huuu, dasar lupa sama janji ke temen sendiri!” kataku sambil mendorong bahunya
Tak lama kemudian pesanan kami datang. Kami mulai menyantapnya. Kami tenggelam dalam obrolan kami tentang masa depan. Tentang rencana setelah lulus SMA. Rinduku padanya terbayar. Aku sangat merindukan momen-momen seperti ini. Momen-momen dimana aku lupa dengan keadaan sekitar, hanya ada aku, Dika dan obrolan kami yang lama-lama tambah ngawur. Setelah makanan habis Dika membayar makanan kami, tapi aku menolak. “Udah deh, Fi, itung-itung pajak jadian gue sama Intan. Hehe…” Ah, Dika memang pintar cari-cari alasan. Dika mengantarku pulang, sebelum masuk rumah aku mengucapkan terimakasih. Malam ini aku akan tidur dengan nyenyak sepertinya.
Esoknya di sekolah aku bertemu dengan Dika, dia bersikap dingin. Kami berpapasan tapi dia tidak menyapaku. Heran. Aku bertanya-tanya sepanjang hari mengapa Dika bersikap seperti itu. Pasti ada sesuatu yang terjadi dengan Dika. Malamnya aku memberanikan diri untuk mengirim SMS.
“Dik, lo gapapa kan? Hari ini gue liat lo murung bgt. Kl ada apa2 cerita ya…”
Dika langsung membalas seperti biasa dan kami berSMS ria
“Gapapa, Fi. Cuma lagi berantem sm Intan, biasalah anak muda hahaha”
“Oh, yaudah baik2 lo. Jangan berantem lama2”
“Iya bawel, makasih ya lo perhatian banget sm gue. Jadi malu hahaha”
“Ih, ge-er bgt! Yaudah ah sana belajar, emg lo ga ada PR?”
“Ga ada tuch, asik kanLo kali yang banyak PR”
“Iya banget, kok lo tau sih. Yaudah ya bye”
“Bye :-) G’night. Sleep tight”
***
Seminggu kemudian aku melihat Intan dan Dika bertengkar di kantin. Aku tidak mendengar apa yang mereka perdebatkan, aku hanya melihat dari jauh. Malamnya aku kembali mengirim SMS kepadanya.
“Dik, td gue liat lo berantem sm Intan. Knp? Gue tlfn lo ya”
“Iya, Fi, tlfn gue aja. Gue bth cerita bgt”
Aku langsung menyambar telepon di samping tempat tidurku. Aku langsung menghubungi Dika.
“Halo…”
“Fiona?”
“Iya, Dik. Kenapa lo?”
“…”
“Dik? Lo masih disitu kan?”
“Iya..”
“Kenapa? Katanya mau cerita”
“Sebenernya gue udah mau cerita lama tentang ini”
“Kenapa sih berantemnya sama Intan?”
“Sepele sih, Fi. Lo inget waktu gue ngajak lo makan mie aceh?”
“He-eh. Terus kenapa?”
“Iya waktu itu gue ga bilang sama Intan kalo gue pergi sama lo”
“Terus?”
“Ya dia cemburu mungkin…”
“Hahahaha kok bisa sih? Gak mungkin juga gue bakal ngerebut lo dari dia.”
“Iya gue udah bilang sama dia berkali-kali, kita cuma temen”
“Terus dia gimana?”
“Awalnya dia gapapa, terus yang lo SMS gue minggu lalu. Dia baca SMSnya terus makin cemburu gitu mungkin…”
“Terus kalian gimana? Ga putus kan?”
“Ya gitu, Fi. Udah ga tahan gue sama dia”
“Loh loh loh? Jadi putus nih?
“He-eh. Udah ga bisa diperjuangkan lagi, Fi.”
“Bahasa lo, diperjuangkan… Hahaha. Yaudah jangan sedih masih banyak ikan di laut”
“Iya, Fi. Dia posesif banget. Awal-awal gue masih ngerasa kalo dia perhatian banget. Tapi lama-lama perhatiannya dia kelewatan. Dia gak suka kalo gue deket sama cewek, termasuk sama lo. Misalnya gue cerita tentang lo gitu dia pasti langsung ngambek”
“Oh, ya ampun, yaudah Dik sabar ya…”
“Fi…”
“Ya?”
“Maaf ya…”
“Maaf kenapa?”
“Gue nyuekin lo akhir-akhir ini”
“Oh iya gapapa Dik. Gue ngerti kok. Maaf juga ya waktu itu gue tiba-tiba marah sama lo”
“Iya Fi, gue ngerti perasaan lo”
“Sok tau lo. Huuu”
“Serius, soalnya gue ngerasain hal yang sama”
“…”
“…”
“Apaan emangnya?”
“Lo sebenernya kehilangan gue banget kan waktu itu. Lo kan sayang banget sama gue, Fi!
“Ih amit-amit deh mending gue sayang sama kucing gue daripada sayang sama lo”
Seandainya Dika benar-benar mengetahui yang aku rasakan sekarang. Seandainya aku cukup berani mengatakan yang sebenarnya. Kami seperti biasa tenggelam dalam obrolan kami sampai lupa waktu. Malam itu ditutup dengan sayup-sayup lagu Buat Kamu dari Syaharani di radio.
Tak perlu dekat jika hari bisa rasakan hadirnya
Tak perlu terungkap sebab hidup rahasia
Bagiku cukup ‘tuk menikmati yang ada dan terjadi
Semoga mengerti
***
Dalam rangka tugas cerpen pelajaran Bahasa Indonesia dan terinspirasi dari lagu Buat Kamu - Syaharani... Dangdut banget ga sih ceritanya hahaha

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Belief

About 34 hours from now, I'm going to have my National Exam. I supposed to be in my room right now, but here I am, writing this post in front of computer. No special things I'm going to write, just my random thoughts as usual.

I dont care what people think, say, and talk about me. I just dont give a damn. I believe what I believe. Well, I'm not that idealistic but yeah I have my own belief. My father once said that, religion is not just about praying to your God and do your God's command. It's also about sticking up with its value, what your religion told you to, and apply it in your life. My father was right. Your ibadah is only your bussiness with your God. What you do, how you act, what you say, is your bussiness with other people.

No, I'm not a good person, I'm still far from it but I'm trying to be one. I do cheat but no not for this one. It's just not me.

Do your best and let God do the rest :) Bismillah...

Monday, March 8, 2010

Dear, Failure! Please Don't Be My Middle Name!

I lost my ability in writing. I've been just writing three post this year. It's kinda hectic moment of my life. It's overwhelming. I really am stressful. In this moment I just wanna take a break. I want to have a getaway. And I found that my blog is the perfect getaway. Writing is one of my favourite thing to do when I feel so mess up. I ever wrote my blog while crying or even with fully-smile-face. and I dont care about what I wrote because I know people won't read it haha.

My ultimate goal this year: become med school student, not just FKUGM. As long as it's med school and I'm being accepted there I will definitely take it. No, I'm not pesimistic with my very first goal, but I'm just being realistic. About fifteen thousand people are wanting to become med school student this year and just about 300++ luckiest of all gonna be accepted. That's a huge number guys! It's 1 : 50!!! And I failed in my very first enroll test. PBS. And I'm going to have UTUL UGM, UM I UNDIP, SIMAK UI... Bismillah, I hope the failure won't come to me again and it won't be my middle name this year.

Why medical school? Why doctor?I don't know, it's my dream job since I was in kindergarten. I never found anything more interesting than become doctor. No, don't say because my mom is a doctor. Yes she is a doctor, but not the one who works in hospital. She is working in Ministry of Health and she's travelling alot. She's far away from what a real doctor look like. But I want to be like her, but just the travelling parts. Hahaha. Now, she is in Bangkok and later in July she will be in Washington. Oh I'm so envy her. Okay, back to the main topic.

And this school is going to help me to support my goal: having my own hospital for the needy and poor people, free of charge!!! I have to own it someday. Really. Like, my very own thing.

God, please help me get through this moment of my life. I really am work as hard as I can.
Just You who can help me, ya Allah...

Leonardo DiCaprio

Siapa sih yang ga kenal sama aktor satu ini? Kalo lo ga kenal, ter-la-lu. Kenapa gue tiba2 mau ngomongin dia? Karena kemaren baru aja nntn Shutter Island, filmnya dia setelah film paling terakhir Body of Lies dan Revolutionary Road keluar pada tahun 2008. I kinda miss him. And after 2 years waiting I finally watched him again.

Dari film-film Leo yg udah gue liat: The Basketball Diaries, Titanic, The Beach, Catch Me If You Can, The Aviator, The Departed, Blood Diamond, Body of Lies, Revolutionary Road dan terakhir Shutter Island, kemampuan akting Leo makin oke aja.

Pertama kali liat dia di Titanic, waktu itu gue masih SD, gue cuma liat dia dari tampang doang, ya maklumlah masih anak-anak. Seiring dengan berjalannya waktu, pas SMP kelas 2 kl ga salah gue nntn Catch Me If You Can, disitu pertama kali gue jatuh cinta sama Leonardo DiCaprio. Di film ini Leo jadi buronannya Tom Hanks, karena dia pinter bgt malsu2in cek, terus dia ganti2 profesi, mulai co-pilot sampai jadi dokter, semua itu dia lakukan tanpa pengalaman bener2 cuma dari baca dan nonton. Di film ini Leo bener2 bisa akting, dia heart-robber bgt disini haha. Itu kenapa gue jatuh cinta sama dia di film ini.

Terus gue nntn The Departed, suka bgt gue sm film ini walaupun harus nonton 2 kali dulu untuk ngerti gimana ceritanya, bagus bgt hey! Ga heran menang Oscar Best Picture tahun itu. Terus gue mulai nyari DVD film2nya. Gue nemu Aviator, gue ga begitu suka dia disini gatau kenapa. Terus gue nntn Blood Diamond, gue suka ceritanya, akting si Leo makin meyakinkan disini. Terus nntn Body of Lies, filmnya too political, gue ga begitu suka, Leo makin mateng aja aktingnya. Dan semakin kesini gue makin penasaran sama sepak terjang dia di dunia perfilman, tahun ini akhirnya dia muncul lagi di layar lebar.

Shutter Island adalah film thriller pertama yg gue tonton sendirian di bioskop ahahaha. Gue sebelumnya ga pernah berani nntn begini2an sendirian, tp demi kerinduan sama abang Leo gue bela2in nonton sendirian, ujan2, capek abis atletik, tapi perngorbanan itu benar2 terbayar. Gue paling suka akting Leo disini dari seluruh film dia yang udah gue tonton. Gue pengen nntn lagi! Asli ini filmnya ga bosen, padahal gue adalah orang yang gampang bosen, nntn Avatar aja gue tidur haha. Kl gue ga lagi musim2 belajar gue bakal nntn lagi, tapi apa daya, gue udah berjanji kalo Shutter Island adalah film terakhir gue sebelum ujian2 perguruan tinggi selesai.Gue ga sabar nunggun Inception!!! Sampai bertemu di Inception ya mas Leo hahahaha

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Hidup itu ga adil...

Kata siapa? Siapa yang bilang hidup ga adil?
Semua orang bilang hal itu gila!
Yah kl buat gue itu udah cukup adil karena semua merasa hidup itu ga adil

Thursday, January 7, 2010

I MISS BLOGGING; PRAY FOR ME!!!

Halooooooooooo!

GUE ADALAH MERUPAKAN SANGAT KANGEN NGEBLOG!!! *kalimat ga efektif sedunia*

Apa kabar kalian? Semoga baik

Kabar gue? Alhamdulillah masih dikasih umur sama Allah, masih bisa nafas sampai sekarang. Masih berjuang untuk meraih mimpi dan cita-cita haha bahasanya...

Ya sekarang gue kelas XII, seperti anda semua ketahui *padahal ga semua tau juga sih ya*, dan disibukkan dengan belajar dan belajar buat persiapan UN dan tes masuk PTN ternama di Indonesia. Sebagai putra putri bangsa Indonesia yang memiliki cita-cita setinggi langit dan yang mulia *Amin* gue pengen, mau, harus, wajib, insya Allah *tolong diaminin: Amiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin!* jadi dokter. Ya dan gue memilih Universitas Gadjah Mada sebagai pilihan perguruan tinggi untuk melanjutkan studi untuk meraih cita-cita yang tersebut diatas.

Ya jadi di post ini saya memohon doa dan restu bapak-bapak ibu-ibu adek kakak om tante pakde bude semuanya!!!

Segenap bangsa Indonesia bahkan orang di seluruh pelosok dunia tolong doakan saya, Afifah Sekar Arum, bisa keterima dan jadi mahasiswi di FKUGM 2010 melalui jalur PSB, UTUL atau bahkan SNMPTN gak masalah asal bisa lolos dari serbua 15000 orang yang juga pengen masuk sana.

Let's do your math! 15000an yang minat masuk FKUGM, sementara hanya 400an yang keterima, jadi gue harus bersaing dengan 350an orang. May force be with me!

Ya Allah hanya kepada-Mu akan berserah diri dan meminta pertolongan
Ya Allah saya bukan meminta apa yang saya inginkan tapi apa yang saya benar-benar butuhkan dan yang terbaik buat saya
Ya Allah kabulkanlah doaku,orangtuaku, teman-temanku, saudara-saudaraku.
Amin